Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Bad Hair Day

Now we have all had one of those days when one’s hair refuses to do as it is told. Whether it is an outright rebellion or simply disobedient, crooked, crimped or otherwise confused hair demands immediate attention.

Seraph + Splendor are quite divergent in their hair related issues. Seraph has opted for a sleek and easily maintained look. Thus avoiding brushes, combs and the general laws of physics (but that is a story for another time…) Splendor on the other hand, must deal with two feet of unruly, demon possessed hair on a daily basis. Perhaps the phrase RAT’S NEST could occasionally apply or perhaps not... no one will ever know.

Anyone who has had their hair colored can relate to Madame Yevonde’s lovely photographs. The image above (depicting the goddess Arethusa on the left, Ceres to the right) rather reminds us of the strange and disturbing ordeal of a partial foil (or a full foil if your hair stylist is feeling extra sadistic…) There is nothing quite like the experience having NOXIOUS BOILING CHEMICALS applied to one’s hair, which is then folded into small sheets of aluminum foil (rather resembling packets of leftovers or an alien abduction experiment) and then placed under a hair dryer for hours on end…You can usually tell when it is over when your scalp begins to SMOLDER.

Don’t you hate it when you have an aquatic related hair malady? Sea shells, coral and starfish should be used as a hairstyle by PROFESSIONAL MERMAIDS ONLY!
Wearing flowers in your hair is one of those girly notions that we do not quite approve of. Perhaps you can get away with it if you are a nymph (as in a mythological nature deity) NOT a nymphomaniac (as in every other Cradle of Filth song.) Now to anyone NOT familiar with CoF, we suggest you DO NOT go looking them up on the internet, for it will only ruin your day…) The jewel encrusted tiaras pictured below are rather tempting, but we still prefer to go unadorned by floral hair contraptions.







And finally GOING FOR BAROQUE is another interesting hair related strategy (tragedy?) Now we rather like Erte’s solution (see lead picture of) of balancing your bouffant with a tassel and birdcage skirt but the idea of planting an orchard upon one’s head is taking things too far…


I will trace the knot of serpents in your hair
Plot your face, then ascending marble stares
You shall pluck me, masked, from roses-in-despair
Tasting my blood
That runs from worming tongue like prayer


(Medusa And Hemlock by Cradle of Filth)

8 comments:

Petra Voegtle said...

Hi Splendor,
that's why I never go to the hairdresser - I simply hate it to be nailed to a chair for hours. My hair reaches to the waist as well and all I do is getting my dear partner cut it from time to time. Any colouring I do myself - cheaper, skin friendlier and I KNOW what's coming out - LOL!
Btw - that baroque comb is a jewel!!! Do you happen to own that piece???

[Tara] said...

Oh my goodness...I want to wear a crazy Marie-Antoinette hair piece for just one day...
I presented you with the "splash" award on my blog! Cheers,
Tara
http://nothing-elegant.blogspot.com

Hair design said...

I'm so happy with this article. It shows a lot of hair arts even in the other figure they formed a hairstyle like sea shells. Its very inspiring, thank you for sharing....

Seraph + Splendor said...

Thanks everyone for your comments - we really appreciate them!

S+S

Rose C'est La Vie said...

Divine post. Thank you for pulling all these strands together..

Lauren said...

Hahaha agreed on Cradle of Filth.

Seraph + Splendor said...

Finally someone understands...

Alli said...

Where did you find the drawing by Leon Bakst with the stars and crazy wires? I need to find the name of that drawing -- if you could help I would be eternally grateful!

Allison

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